Bush’s Stock Soars, Shockey’s Stock Plummets, and Payton Proposes a Bail Out

So far this season, the Saints have proven to be about as stable as my 401K account with Lehman Brothers. The latest butt-clenching news from the front office is that Jeremy Shockey will be out for the next 3-6 weeks with a hernia injury. (Hmmm…and now for some reason my groin hurts.) That means we’re now down our top wide receiver Marques Colston and our top tight end. The good news is, it’s not too late for a bail out…Congress style!

Coach Sean Payton pledged on Monday that Deuce is coming back. As for why that comeback didn’t take place in time for yesterday’s 4th and goal or 3rd and one, Payton says “chill-ax”; he’s got his reasons.

“I think we would have been hard-pressed to shove Deuce in at that point in the game not having had any carries and say, ‘Hey go get us a yard,’ when he hadn’t worked on short-yardage during the week.”

(Anybody wanna bet on whether Deuce will be taking some short-yardage snaps in practice this week?)

Meanwhile, Reggie Bush finds his stock shooting up faster than oil prices. It seems the national media sees eye to eye with the Chicks on Bush’s promising start in ’08. He picked up 178 all purpose yards in yesterday’s game against the Broncos. (Now if we could only figure out how to get him to pick up that pesky one yard that keeps costing us games…) Not only do we and the national media know he’s better, Lil Reggie is also starting to gain confidence in himself.

“I think I am a lot better player than in my first two seasons. Hard work is paying off…We showed heart and fight, not enough, but a lot of it. It hurts.”

Wanna know what really hurts? Reggie said (out loud) that he plans on marrying girlfriend Kim Kardashian and breeding a whole family of big-bootied babies. Bush didn’t specify when he and Kim plan to walk down the aisle, but implied it would be sooner rather than later. (Would it be tacky of me to throw condoms instead of rice after the ceremony?)

Finally, the Broncos are either giving hand jobs to the refs before each game or they’re the luckiest bastards alive. Coach Payton says the refs missed a crucial neutral zone infraction call on that infamous 3rd and 1 during yesterday’s game. Payton stopped short of blaming the no-call on the Saints loss. He also admits that the Saints failed to make offensive adjustments after realizing how the defense had lined up to stop the run. (Couldn’t agree with you more, P Diddy.)

Let me just end this by saying that I appreciate the way Sean Payton is handling his critics (myself included) and addressing the media head on about the things we Saints fans question. Your lovely wife Beth was right about you, Coach. You may not agree with the guy on everything but you have to respect that he respects the fans enough to answer our whining about what he “should have” and “could have” done. And while you can’t deny there were some questionable coaching calls in Denver, there’s also no denying that the head Coach had a little something to do with the 500+ yards in offense we racked up. So simmer down all you “the sky is falling-Chicken Little-Fairweather-crap bags!”

The Nola Chick has spoken.

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Known for rage-ful outbursts, commitment to game day beer drinking, and overall zest for all things black and gold!

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