Griffin Goulash

In our opening weekend of football, the revamped New Orleans Saints defense  will feast their eyes on rookie quarterback, Washington Redskins’ Robert Griffin III, who knows how to run like the dickens and sign deals with the likes of Subway, Addidas, and Gatorade, making him one of the most sought-after rookies for crazy-ass deals. Yes, crazy-ass deals, I tell you. Who in their right mind would sign off on a barbecued chicken statue of themselves? Foie gras, perhaps. Possibly caviar. Hell, even jambalaya, but barbecued chicken? If you don’t believe me, see for yourself; I couldn’t make this sh*t up, even if I tried. With family ties here in the New Orleans area, RGIII, as he is … [Read more...]

Saints Sunday Dinner: Meat-Roaf a la Canton

After months of this most awful of offseasons, the football gods have finally graced the Who Dat Nation with the beginning of football season and what a way to ring in the new season with the induction of former Saint Left Tackle and all-around fantastic gentleman, Willie Roaf, into the hallowed halls of Canton. Native of Pine Bluff, Arkansas and the son of a dentist and the first African American woman to serve on the Arkansas Supreme Court, the Saints drafted Roaf as the 8th overall pick 1993. He evolved into one of the best Left Tackles ever to play the game and spent nine years of his 13-year career with the Saints. Players, coaches, and administrative personnel praised him for his … [Read more...]

Falcon Meat Stew

I hate the Falcons. I mean I really, truly, utterly, completely hate them with every fiber of my being. I hate them more than I hate both the Patriots and the Cowboys combined. The Falcons are foul creatures. They smell nasty. They are ugly--even their mamas don’t like them. And, of course, the Saints are playing them Sunday at noon in the first of two showdowns between these mortal enemies. The Saints have won four of the last five games, but they have all been close ones. With the division  title on the line, I can’t think of anywhere else that I want to be come Sunday, except in front of my tv, decked in our my Saints gear, gobbling up a steaming bowl of falcon meat stew. Falcon meat … [Read more...]

Rib O’Rams

Today the Saints face the hapless St. Louis Rams…you have heard of the Rams, right? You know, of the 0-7 fame, much like the Indy Dolts who were emasculated last week in a 62-7 loss to our glorious boys? If the Saints score 41 points today, they will set an NFL record for most points in two consecutive games. With our breaking so many records right now, we might as well go for this one and feast on Sammy Bradford et al. I’m licking my chops as I wait for the noon kickoff. The Saints and the Rams have a long history and at one point were division rivals, so I’ve never had much love for these losers.  Our very first touchdown on our very first play back in 1967 took place against the … [Read more...]

Barbecue Dem Birds

In preparation for our biannual bashing of our neighbors to the east, I’ve considered lately the not-so-glorious poultry, otherwise known as Falcon meat. I know that these birds can be nasty, foul, disgusting, disease ridden creatures; yet, for some reason, I crave them right now, especially on a glorious Sunday morning here in our fair city of New Orleans. And, no, I’m not going to stick any pins or needles into my voodoo doll this morning during my pre-game ritual, unlike what I did to Brett Farve a couple of weeks back. Don’t have to—someone did it for me. And, since a dirty bird can’t fly with no broken wing, I offer up to you the Dirty Bird Dry Rub, compliments from our friends at … [Read more...]