A PSA to Saints Fans Mourning Traded “Hotties”

Attention all female Saints fan... It's your new friend Sassy Chick. Pull up a chair. Let's chat. Yes, football players are fine as sin. I used to watch Terrell Owens warm up because oooohhh weeee but once the clock started, it's all football and I was hoping that our CBs knocked his block off. The ONLY way that would have changed is if he was in black and gold. With that said, if y'all don't stop whining about cute players getting cut your fan card is getting pulled. Kenny Stills was cute in an "uber metro, refuse to let go of the Honey Badger 2013 blonde Mohawk" kind of way but your local grocery bagger is cute too. Are you going to cry when he quits? If you're a Jimmy fan or a … [Read more...]

Chick Fight: Redskins vs Cowboys

The Thanksgiving holiday reminds us all to reflect on our blessings while enjoying a delightful feast of fatty foods, begrudging the seat at the kiddie table and avoiding that uncle who spits while he talks. It’s enough to make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside! But this great American tradition wouldn’t be complete without a little trash talk and tackling. (And we’re not talking about what happens after grandma has one too many pieces of rum cake.) Football is at the heart of the holiday and we’re in for a lineup of games guaranteed to give you more heartburn than that third plate of stuffing you swore you wouldn’t eat. One of the oldest rivalries around will play out in Cowboys … [Read more...]

Chick Fight: Clash of the Fans

Just when you thought the East Coast -West Coast battle ended with Tupac and Biggie, then came this week’s Chick Fight. In one corner, a die-hard female football fan with loads of “California Love” for her San Francisco 49ers. In the other corner, a Buffalo Bills believer who thinks QB Ryan Fitzpatrick “loves it when she calls him Big Poppa!” What never officially got settled in the hip-hop world could finally get settled on the field this Sunday when the Niners and Bills face off in a different kind of clash of the coasts. But before we get down to the gridiron nitty-gritty, get to know these superfans…and the creepy things they’ll do to try and will their teams to victory. Team … [Read more...]

The NFL Fans’ Lockout Demands

Here we are in June. School's out for summer. My bikini friendly six pack is making a triumphant return. The humidity has turned my hair into an unrecognizable mass of debris. And yet, none of that matters because there may not be a football season in a few months. The NFL lockout could come to a head this Friday when both sides return to court. A judge will decide whether to lift the lockout, putting players in a significantly stronger bargaining position. If the lockout remains, the owners hold all the chips. Meanwhile, all of us fans have realized that Super Bowl predictions this year aren't about which team will make it, but whether there will be a Super Bowl in 2012 to begin … [Read more...]

What Do Single Ladies Love More: The Super Bowl or Sex?

Hey ladies, which of these options sounds more appealing to you come Super Bowl Sunday? a) Working up a sweat with your man between the sheets -OR- b) Watching a bunch of sweaty men roll around with each other According to a new survey, most of you would prefer the latter. The dating website Zoosk.com revealed that for many women, Super Bowl Sunday is a "no nookie zone." Their survey shows 73% of women would rather watch the game than get it on. That's compared to 50% of men. (Wait a minute...a man, at ANY moment, would actually turn down sex??) It makes sense you know. Just think about it: the anxiety, uncontrollable perspiration, screaming, and the inevitable orgasmic wave … [Read more...]