A Saints Fan’s Heartfelt Letter to the Falcons

Dear Dirty Birds, ROFLMAO!!! Now that I've gotten that out of my system, how are you? I hear you've been, um, going through some things. Totes sucks. I remember last year when I was going through some similar woes. You weren't exactly there for me. In fact, I sort of remember you mocking me mercilessly. I can't say I was surprised given our complicated past and the fact that I typically wouldn't pee on you if you were on fire. With that said, I'll admit it was tough having things go so poorly for me while they seemed to be coming up roses for you. Here we are, a year later, and the shoe is on the other foot. (And given the current status of your team, I'm assuming that … [Read more...]

1 and Oh How I Hate the Falcons

If someone had told me a week ago that, with under a minute left in the game, the Atlanta Falcons would have 1st and goal with an opportunity to win the game and it would be up to the New Orleans Saints poor, tired, beleaguered defense to stop them, I would have possibly either slapped them in the face for putting such a nightmare in my head or stabbed myself in the eyeballs to avoid watching how it would all unfold. Who could blame me though? These guys couldn't stop a faucet from running last year. Their defense was the worst in NFL history. Rob Ryan might bring them some new swagger, but he's not a miracle worker. Or is he??? What happened in the final seconds of the Saints … [Read more...]

Saints Week 2: This Time, It’s Ridiculous

While watching the Saints' defense get dismantled by Cam Newton and the Panthers, I realized I hadn't had that much fun since that time I was at a construction site and a rusty nail went through my foot. But as painful as it was to watch, I must say I walked away from Sunday's horrid ordeal with a positive outlook. You see unlike in week 1, this week I was smart enough to stock up on both beer AND wine before the game. Oh wait...you thought I saw something positive in that crap-tacular display we put on the field? Don't be silly, little birdies! I've pulled things out of my dog's butt that looked better than our alleged "defense." We couldn't tackle. We couldn't cover. We couldn't … [Read more...]

Saints vs FAILcons: How Sweet It Is to Be Loathed By You

If we Saints fans didn't hate the Falcons so much, we'd probably feel sorry for them. After all, it has to suck to have your own dome taken over by chants of a rival team. It must sting to watch the Who Dat Nation second-line around your stadium, year...after year...after year. It's gotta hurt to see Drew Brees make himself at home in the Georgia Dome so often, in a way that could best be described as a hated neighbor taking a dump in your toilet, after eating all your food and before hunching your wife in your bed. Yes my friends, I'd imagine it's gotta suck to be a Falcons fan on days like today. Thankfully, we hate them way too much to feel any empathy. In fact, their tears are … [Read more...]

Saints v. Bucs Recap: Who’s Running Things Now?

When you get your butt whipped by one of the sorriest teams in the league (I'm looking at you, St. Louis) you have but two options: 1) Kill yourselves 2) Come back harder and stronger against a solid opponent and prove to yourselves and the rest of the league that you remain a force to be reckoned with. While Nola Chick strongly considered the former, thankfully the Saints committed themselves to the latter. They were on a mission against the Tampa Bay Bucs and it showed. I could see something in Drew Brees' eyes as he came out of that tunnel. He had vengeance on his mind. He wasn't just out to avenge the Bucs for what they did to the Saints earlier in the season. He was out to … [Read more...]